Although I’m only 26 (wink, wink, nudge, nudge). I’ve been Husband’s life for 20 years (Sheesh that’s a long time). For years, even before we were married I have been tasked with gift giving. I took this on willingly. Men, especially David, don’t have a particular acumen for picking out Mother’s Day gifts or remembering his sister’s birthday. I like doing it. But….
But there’s one date that my brain absolutely REFUSES to remember for all time. Unfortunately this date is Husband’s mother’s birthday. I have an excuse… Truly I do. For years – more than a decade even – before I even had to remember or recognize my now mother-in-law’s birthday, Husband has told me that she was born on D-Day. As a history major and enthusiast this was easy for me to remember. Duh, D-Day, June 6, 1944. Easy. Done. Got it!!!!
While dating husband neglected some birthdays of his mother’s. He was in the Army or otherwise occupied. It was fine. When I came in the picture “for reals,” I wanted to make sure I had this all worked out. “When’s your mother’s birthday,” I’d ask. Husband would answer, “Oh that’s easy! Mom was born on D-day!” Again as the history person my brain automatically registered: June 6, 1944. I scooted by some years by sending something around June 1st, so if there wasn’t a call on the actually day, we were OK. Years pass and send her flowers or whatever sort of acknowledgement on June 6 thinking I have thinks spot on... Through events that I don’t really recall, it was brought to my attention that her birthday, in fact is NOT on D-day….. WTH?!?!?! So through some “cloak and dagger” methods and old fashioned research, I learned that her birthday IS NOT D-Day!!!!! My mother in law was born on June 2, 1942….. Ahhhhh!!!!! He didn’t even have the year correct. Not even the right day. How that was confused at D-day, I’ll not bother to know. But by this point, my feeble mind has it ingrained that her birthday is June 6, 1944. I.Can’t.Get.Past.This….. So for years, I’ve been trying to remember when exactly her birthday is. My brain refuses to retain this information – much to my chagrin and dismay.
As gifts and birthdays are my division I’ve had to do some “finagling” and covering up to hide my (and Husband’s) ignorance.
That brings me to this week. Double crap!!! Waking up with a start I realize that mother-in-law’s birthday is this week and I don’t know if it is the 2nd or the 4th (or perhaps some other day). I look up and my phone and the date reads June 3rd. I’ve got a 50/50 shot here, people.
Husband has left on his primitive, off the grid fishing trip in Northern Minnesota. Desperately hoping that he’s at least not out of texting range I send him a message reading, “You haven’t missed your mom’s birthday AGAIN have you???” Later I get a simple response, “No.” I’m relieved but I still don’t have the answer I require. Before he gets truly “off grid” he calls me. “So do you know when your mother’s birthday is???” “Yes,” he answers. It was on the – wait for it – THE 2ND!!!
I’ll not subject you to the string of expletives that came from my mouth. How could he think that WE didn’t miss her birthday? He was in “guy fishing mode.” I asked him if he’d called her. “Well, no!” was his impassive, nonchalant response. I recall more expletives here. The he said, “Why don’t you give her a call, she’d love to hear from you….” GRRRRRRR. I conjure up some lame-o excuse about “getting Husband off on his trip.” She was gracious and warm as always. Husband’s sister has whisked her off on a girls’ vacation since Husband’s father and Husband are together fishing on her 70th birthday. I didn’t get specifics, but it sounded like they were in a hotel suite somewhere finishing up shrimp cocktails and deciding when to go to the spa. I was glad for the reprieve, but I vaguely wondered why I wasn’t included. But that’s for another day.
So here’s hoping that from here on out I can remember that the “Date that will live in infamy,” IS NOT MY MOTHER IN LAW’S BIRTHDAY…..